Of course if you would like to order printed copies, or multiple copies for use in an office, school or other organization, you can still order them directly from me from the Say Something Nice page.

From being outgoing and giving, to being generous to a fault, my father has taught me what it is to be both a good dad and a good citizen. I can’t say that I followed all the lessons all of the time, and I can’t say that all of the lessons were perfect either (sorry dad!), but I can say that I could always look to dad for honest and thoughtful advice. There were times when he should have been much tougher on me than he was. And trust me, there were times when I felt he was way too tough. But, I wouldn’t trade him for any other dad.

So please, do me a favor. Allow me this one intrusion into Mitch Carnell’s website, and wish him a happy birthday. Hopefully there will be many, many more to come!

            Don’t get caught napping. There are always new ideas, new approaches, and new opportunities. It requires an active wide awake mind to catch them. Choose an attitude of alertness. Be ready for what is and what comes next. Be receptive. Remain expectant. Don’t automatically shut out the unfamiliar. Neither fall for every new fad.

            Others have sacrificed for you. Many have gone out on a limb for you. You are the recipient of the efforts of others.  Appreciation on your part is always an appropriate attitude.  Let others know how grateful you are for what they have done for you. None of us get there on our own. We have all had a helping hand. Think about the last good thing that happened to you. Who was involved? How did you meet them? Who introduced you? Why were they there? My wife is a teacher because her ninth grade teacher saw the potential in her that no one else had seen or encouraged. One person made the difference. One person fanned the flame that resulted in a lifetime of helping countless others reach their potential. Appreciation doesn’t cost a cent, but the dividends keep growing and growing. Adopt an attitude of appreciation. In twenty eight years of teaching imagine how many lives Carol influenced.

Carol in Central Park

            Be a magnet for new ideas. Don’t demean an idea or an approach because it hasn’t been tried before. Who knows? It may be great. If not, so what? What have you lost? At least you know one more thing that doesn’t work. It is an amazing phenomenon; those who are open to new ideas somehow get more new ideas. They become attractors for new ideas. Many say, if it isn’t broke don’t fix it. Just because it isn’t broken doesn’t mean that it can’t be better. Don’t close off the possibilities. “What if,” can be your best friend.

            Jesus said, “Unless you change and become like little children, you will not enter the kingdom of heaven.” There are thousands who do not love the president and thousands more who don’t even like him. Unfortunately there are thousands who really do hate him and many of them call themselves Christian. According to the Scriptures, you cannot hate your fellow man and love God. You cannot love the Creator and hate His creation. There should always be questioning, disagreement, debate, but hate of an individual or a nation has no place in religious dialogue. We all have something to learn from this fourth grader, a lesson that is long overdue. Thank you Terence.

It is way past time to return to a path of reason. Because we disagree with each other does not make either of us evil. There is no way to justify murder. There is an overwhelming need to soften our national and local discourse. The cities of Charleston and North Charleston have established Say Something Nice Day. Many of our churches celebrate Say Something Nice Sunday; however, even that modest attempt at more civil dialogue has brought forth unbelievable criticism of, “An attempt to create an atmosphere of anything goes.” Nothing could be further from the truth. The message is that we have the ability to disagree without descending into viciousness. We will never agree on all the issues great and small that divide us; however, we are capable of respecting one another and if we search diligently we can find some common ground.

The month of June is National Better Communication Month. Why not give a more civil tone a try? Why not try to speak with less fire and more reason? Why not tune the hate merchants out at least for this month? The return to civility starts with each one of us. We can each be an example of mature reason and communication.

I don’t know why he sold it. Perhaps it was mother’s Alzheimer’s or his retirement, but he grieved for that truck. On the way home from town one day he saw a similar truck for sale. He bought it on the spot.

“Didn’t you drive it first?” I asked.

“No,” he said.

“Didn’t you at least bargain on the price?’I continued.

“Listen,” he said. “I have known that man all of my life. He isn’t going to cheat me.”

“That’s naive,” I can hear you saying. But wouldn’t you like to trust like that? More important, wouldn’t you like to be trusted that way? What a reputation! What a testimony to both men!

Trust is the number one trait we want in our leaders, supervisors, significant others, and friends.

Twenty-five years ago when I was searching for a chief audiologist for the Charleston Speech and Hearing Center, Dr. Doug McDonald, director of the speech and hearing program at the Veterans Hospital in Columbia and someone whom I respect greatly, told me, “If you can persuade Stuart Cohen to come to Charleston, you’ll have a winner.”

Stuart and I worked together for 22 years in an unbelievable professional relationship. I often heard Stuart counseling patients about the purchase of a hearing aid. Many times he was persuading the patient that he/she did not need to buy the most expensive model or that he/she was not ready for one at all. This in spite of the great profit to be made in the sale of hearing aids, but Stuart chose his integrity and ours over profit.

Consequently he built a large following of people who trusted his every word. After attending the burial service for Stuart’s father, David, and listening to the eulogies I know where that trust in the truth came from.

What greater compliment can there be than, he is a man of his word or she is a woman of her word?

Too many people make glib promises that they have no intention of carrying out. “Oh, leave it to me. I’ll take care of it.”

The reason I like management by objectives as a planning strategy so much is that it provides a clear-cut decision making process. At the end of the specified time there are only two possible answers – yes I did or no I didn’t. It is a process that can help establish credibility.

In many ways business is suffering. Part of it is due to the economic conditions before the events of Sept. 11. Some of it is due to the events of Sept. 11, but much of it is due to the lack of credible service.

Businesses do not stand behind their products or do not provide dependable quality service.

There is a wonderful sales adage that says, “Promise a lot; deliver more.” If you can’t deliver then don’t make the promise. Customers will respect and accept honesty. Don’t string people along. Don’t bait and switch.

Trust is earned one transaction at a time.

Charleston Receipts was published to support the center, which the Junior League founded in 1947. The proceeds from the sale of the cookbook supported the center for 16 years until it became a member agency of the Trident United Way. Carnell, an ASHA Fellow and past president of the South Carolina Speech Language and Hearing Association, headed the center from 1964 until his retirement in 1999.

Carnell presented the check to Christine Dukes, director of speech language pathology, and Michelle Dressler-Lomano, audiologist at the center’s new satellite offices.